Ram to the Future

This ad isn't that bad, all told, although its key concept is pretty hoary at this point. But I do have a specific issue with it.

Jason Jones: "Are you excited about buying an electric vehicle, but worried that it could leave you... unsatisfied?"

This entire ad is basically a series of jokes about how an electric car running out of batteries is the same as a flaccid penis. Some of them, to be fair, are relatively funny. As I said, this isn't a remotely new concept - scanning the archives on the old blog yields a very similar "banned from the Super Bowl" Bud Light ad in which all the jokes are about farting rather than boners. Or this lame local Comcast ad that compares internet speeds to fucking. Or the Mini ad where trunk space is equated to anal sex. Or the truly terrible Axe ad that throws "balls" around with just the thinnest patina of double entendre.

So yeah. Ram isn't breaking any new ground here. Even the idea of "pretending to be a pharmaceutical ad" is hardly novel. Still, that's not the real problem.

Jones: "Then you could be one of many Americans concerned about... premature electrification."

The second-biggest problem with this ad is that its core concept does not totally make sense. I know what they actually mean, but the obvious play on words is to "premature ejaculation" and yet what's being discussed in the ad doesn't really line up with that; it's more of an erectile dysfunction thing. These are not entirely dissimilar problems, to be sure, but they are hardly identical.

Jones: "Symptoms may include fearing you might not be able to last as long as you'd like..."
Guy #1: "There was plenty of charge before... and... sometimes it goes away."
Woman #1: "A lot of times."
Guy #1: "I've been working a lot."

This first exchange was the one I found the funniest, probably because it had the advantage of coming first. Uh, I mean appearing first in the ad.

Jones: "...being unsure if you have enough power to handle your payload..."

Load, everyone. Am I right?

Guy #2: "I don't know if I got the power for this, baby."
Woman #2: "I'm adventurous, I like to go all the way. I don't want to have to question if we're even gonna make it."
Guy #2: "...yeah."
Woman #2: "It's a concern."

One thing that does tend to bug me about ads that use this trope as a runner is that there is usually a pretty big gap between the effectiveness of the double entendres. For example, "I like to go all the way" is not a very good double entendre in my opinion because that is not an expression that anyone uses unless they are talking about fucking. "I like to go all the way" to the campground? No. No one says that, ever.

Jones: "...lacking the confidence about getting, and being able to keep, a charge..."
Woman #3: "Having to stop every time we got really excited, that wouldn't work for me. Stop, start, stop, start..."

Another thing about this ad... we are well into the electric car boom at this point. I really thought these concerns had largely if not entirely abated. Those Chevy Volt ads where people were confused about how hybrids worked are more than a decade old, and with (for better or worse) the rise of Tesla, it does not seem to me like the average American is still confused by or scared of electric vehicles. Granted, this one is specifically about electric trucks, and so it is trying to address a specific set of people with a specific set of concerns (can this electric truck REALLY handle a camper????). The idea of "premature electrification" is that you rushed into buying an electric car too fast and bought one that couldn't handle your particular outdoor adventure needs or whatever. But that leads me to the final problem here.

Jones: "If PE - premature electrification - is something you're worried about, go to RamREV.com and find out if the Ram 1500 REV, with options being designed to extend range in satisfying ways, is right for you."
[onscreen text: "COMING LATE 2024"]

Late 2024!!!! This was a 2023 Super Bowl ad, remember. Your big pitch, in a time where electric cars are finally gaining substantial traction, is to be like "All electric vehicles are currently trash, but don't worry, Ram trucks will solve this problem in... I dunno, a year and a half? Almost two? Look, we're working on it, okay?"

Meanwhile, Jeep ran this eye-catching ad about hybrid vehicles you can buy right now:

Although this has its own problems that I suppose the Ram spot does go some way to addressing. For starters, if you read the fine print, the charging station shown at the end of the ad is a "concept charging station" (and either way you're probably not finding an effective charging station on top of a mountain anytime soon). In that same fine print, we get this information:

"Wrangler 4xe has an all-electric driving range of 21 miles and Grand Cherokee has an all-electric driving range of 25 miles. Based on EPA estimates with a fully charged battery. Actual mileage may vary."

These are hybrids, so the all-electric range isn't entirely the point, but at an introductory MSRP well over $50,000, it doesn't totally feel like you're getting the added value of a futuristic electric Jeep with a big 20 miles of range (and probably a lot less if you're off-roading). Hooray, my hybrid Jeep made it to the store and back on a single charge! Hmm, why the fuck am I driving a Jeep Wrangler when I live in the suburbs?

The electric truck market is a pretty complex one to navigate - and I mean all the way down to a psychological level. For one thing, there are barely any all-electric trucks yet (though Ram is not alone in promising a 2024-ish delivery of their product, so the market could explode in the near future). I'm sure many of the concerns teased in the Ram ad, like electric vehicles not being able to tow heavy payloads, are legitimately held by many truck owners who might consider going electric. And then of course there's the cultural piece - without trying to dig up stats, I'm sure that the market for pickup trucks is largely dominated by the kind of "real Americans" who like their meat red, their trucks loud, and their women quiet. The segment of this market made up of people offended that electric cars even exist - "rolling coal" has been a problem since the Obama era, and more recently you've had idiots engaging in "ICEing" EV charging stations - will probably never get on board with an all-electric pickup (or even a hybrid). You can pry their black exhaust plumes from their cold, dead hands.

For everyone else, this sort of ad makes some sense, I guess. But it retains a weird "too soon" vibe for me. The product doesn't actually exist yet and, with repeat delays in the Tesla Cybertruck (to be fair, Tesla is a uniquely terrible company in many ways) and other electric trucks being proposed and later canceled outright, it seems a bit risky to advertise for something that may or may not fully deliver on the (admittedly vague) promises being made in this ad. You'd think it would make more sense to run an ad like this once the product is getting ready to roll off the line, but I guess when it's a product that people will own for years, Ram is essentially trying to cockblock other electric automakers and save a retail spot for itself by promising that its electric truck will be the BEST. You know, once it's actually ready to go. Just... just hang on, it's almost... just give me a second. It's chilly in here, okay?